Thursday, December 22, 2016

Dark Funeral - Where Shadows Forever Reign

(ORIGINALLY APPEARED IN SLUG MAGAZINE, ISSUE 336, DECEMBER 2016)
ORIGINAL ARTICLE: http://www.slugmag.com/national-music-reviews/dark-funeral-shadows-forever-reign/


Dark Funeral
Where Shadows Forever Reign

Century Media
Street: 6.03
Dark Funeral = Marduk + Setherial X Dissection

More like Dark Birth. But I’m serious, you guys: This is one of my favorite bands. Although key members have since left during the recording of Where Shadows Forever Reign (and I sure miss the hell out of former vocalist Emperor Magus Caligula), this is some solid-assed shit — like, after a day of eating nothing but concrete dust and water type solid shit — and even heavier.
This album is a ball flying out of my left field (I purposefully walk about with my fly undone for aeration), and it hits you with as much, if not more, infernal melody and crushing majesty seen in the earliest days of the band. Instead of having to take that deep breath you usually need when you play other Dark Funeral albums due to the sheer speed, Shadows is undoubtedly (or maddeningly coincidentally) a nod to their first full-length, The Secrets of the Black Arts, both in sound and aesthetics. Both album covers were done by the legendary Necrolord, who returns to add an extension to the visual storyline of the first album cover. The first track, “Unchain My Soul,” is almost an extension of “The Dawn No More Rises” from the first album. It has that plucked, chilly melodic guitar lead by Lord Ahriman and a bit of breathing space between the assaults of blast beats. And whether it’s intentional or not, Heljmadr, the new vocalist, sounds fucking phenomenal. I haven’t been this impressed with a replacement vocalist since Atteringer (TriumFall, live Propast) in Gorgoroth. “Temple of Ahriman” is a little more of the type of output that we’re used to with the fast-evil onslaught, but it’s still a bit doomier and melodically sinister. This is Dark Funeral, but I’m having an existential crisis over how original yet familiar this all is. I almost thought it was a completely different band, as “As I Ascend” played into what is perhaps the band’s slowest and most crushing moment of their album. This is easily the coolest thing to come out since my last review. Even with my ten-second memory span, I’m confident enough to say that this rules harder than shit.
Where Shadows is Dark Funeral born anew, crawling out of some inter-dimensional, gaping, oozing, primordial womb, and it probably isn’t a pretty sight. Don’t even wank about: Their discog is my phone’s entirety of music, despite the extra unused memory space. On top of giving me my top Dark Pick of 2016, the band also did me the favor of putting the birthing visuals in audio format, which kicks ass. I once watched a video of a woman giving actual birth in high school and got college credit for it (I should have received an honorary degree), I made an oath to myself, right then and there, that no human should ever be created again. With a new album from an old favorite, I’m almost moved enough to believe that humanity shouldn’t be wiped out in a cosmic whirlwind of searing radiation. I have this while I wait for that to happen, however, and I am retracting my statement that Dark Funeral could never make an awesome album without Caligula. Furthermore, Dark Funeral have again proved that they are arguably fiercer, harder and more inspired than the erection their music gives me. –Nuko Kapao

Monday, June 20, 2016

The 13 Best Black Metal Releases Of The Millenium!!!!

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EDITOR'S NOTE: I didn't want this to get published. However, I used to date Ms. Potempkin and borrowed some money from her father five years ago (who happens to be the head of an organized crime syndicate). There's only so much one can say when they have a 12-gauge pressed firmly into their scrotum while being dangled by their neck from a 12-story building. So, without further ado, here's:



The 13 Best Black Metal Releases Of The Millennium!!!! 
By Wendy "Battleship" Potempkin



HEY GUYS!!!! Here's an all-encompassing list of the best 13 BM releases from the millennium, excluding this year! I'll go ahead and start with 2015 and go backwards. Hope ya enjoy it ^_-



1. Ad Hominem - Antitheist

Nuko put this on once he got it last year, and I immediately had to go commando cuz...GOOEY!!! It's so great! I mean, it's probably their best album, and with songs like "Compulsive Extermination" and "Glory Hole Jesus," can you really go wrong?! Can I get a goddamn "Oh you know this, grrl!" up in this bitch?!







2. Ad Hominem - Slaves Of God To The Gallows (The Preemptive Strike 0.1 Reworks) EP



This HAS to be one of the greatest Industrial BM albums out there. I mean, come on. Just really?! Preemptive Strike 0.1 remixing some dope Ad Hominem tracks?!?!?!?! Fuck AND yes!!!









3. Ad Hominem - Dictator - A Monument Of Glory



OMG! "Encomium of Terror," is on this one, so is "Slaves of God"...it's too much...BRB's, my bean isn't going to flick itself! 







4. Ad Hominem - Theory:0

SUCH MUCH ASS KICK ON THIS. The cover of Unleashed's "Execute Them All" is better than tricking some guy at the bar into thinking he'll maybe get to sleep with you except he just ends up giving you free coke all night. Then ur like: "Laters! Gonna go home and listen to Theory:0, d-bag-face!"  UUUUHHHH....YEAH. Pretty much gonna have to talk to the hand if you say this isn't the bomb. Summoning sucks, so does your limited-edition Summoning t-shirt (t-SHIT if it's gotsa Summoning logo on it...ICK), and so do you. Why would you listen to shitty BM with this so easily available?




5. Ad Hominem - Climax Of Hatred

ONE WORD: THIS. This album is proof that there might be a god, but prolly still there isn't...but I give 0 fucks as long as this album is floating around out there somewheres!!! I'm more attracted to men who own this album than expensive cars. Nothing says I don't need a Mercedes because my dick isn't tiny like when a dude's rollin' up in a shitty car bumpin' "My Loudest Scream Of Hate."





6. Funeral Winds/ Leviathan /Ad Hominem / Eternity - Black Metal Against The World (Split) 




We gots Funeral Winds, Leviathan, this one band called Ad Hominem that rules, and Eternity up in this bitch, bitch! Who put's a four-way split release on their best of lists?! ME, THAT'S WHO. #YOLO






7. Geimhre / Ad Hominem - We Are The Wolves... You Are The Sheep / Black Sabbath (Split)


Hookz me up with this, and super size that shit. Xtra sauce? Nope, already need ta change dem panteez, gots plenty.







8. Ornaments Of Sin / Ad Hominem - Treaty Of Alliance (Agony Of A Dying Race) (Split)


They cover each others's's's' songs, and it roolz! LOLZ











9. Ad Hominem / Warfire - Purification (Split)


I'll bet the two guys on the cover aren't even attracted to each other. This split between these two great-ass bands will make you hornier than hell, and you'll end up just grabbing the nearest thing with a mouf, lips, and a tongue then start going at it. I DID!!!! ;)







10. Ad Hominem - A New Race For A New World


I suck at races...but I'd be in first place to get a good look at this new world they're talkin' 'bout (and I don't even know WHAT IT IS HAHAHA!!)!







11. Ad Hominem / Cantus Bestiae - Mankind's Suicide (Split)


All u basic bitches need to give Cantus Bestiae and Ad Hominem a round of 'hellz yeahz' 4 this 1. Make that like 9 to the infinite power of rounds!









12. Ad Hominem - Planet ZOG-The End

Hmmm...Not sure what a "ZOG" is, but put this on and I won't even care, even, ever!









--> 13. Ad Hominem – Omnes Ad Unum (Demo)

BEST. DEMO. EVERZ.

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Urgehal - Aeons In Sodom

(ORIGINALLY APPEARED IN SLUG MAGAZINE, ISSUE 326-FEBRUARY 2016)

ORIGINAL ARTICLE: http://www.slugmag.com/national-music-reviews/urgehal-aeons-in-sodom/


SLUG (Salt Lake UnderGround) MAGAZINE HOMEPAGE: http://www.slugmag.com/


Urgehal
Aeons In Sodom

By Nuko Kapao

 

Season Of Mist
Street: 02.12
Urgehal = Impaled Nazarene + Carpathian Forest x Darkthrone


Urgehal are too often overlooked by dumbasses and hipsters (I know I’m being redundant) when discussing the “second wave” of black metal from Norway. The reasoning behind this is confusing to say the least—Urgehal should be held with religious veneration alongside the rest of the greats. These guys have arguably been at it much longer than their peers, or at least just as long, and deserve all that unearned respect you shitstains keep showering on Liturgy, whose manifesto on black metal should be illegal to own. I think one of you is going to need to take me to the hospital to get my rage hemorrhoid drained just from thinking about it (I’ll do a Cliffnotes version of the “manifesto”: shitty-scarf-wearing douche tries to emo-bukkake the coolest genre of metal with pretentious, rambling bullshit).
Now that that’s out of the way, it should be noted that Aeons in Sodom is somewhat unconventional in the way it was crafted. There isn’t a consistent vocalist throughout the tracks, which I wasn’t even aware of before I read the liner notes, despite my familiarity with the band. If you’ll allow me to describe the album in words Gordon Ramsay would use, it’s kind of like an updated, fresh and rustic approach to the band’s sound. Obviously it’s going to be different than past releases in some ways, but it still retains the essence of the band and much of what makes them unique (the almost Finnish Satanic anger, diabolical urgency and genuinely misanthropic feel of the sound). Perhaps most importantly, Aeons is a departure in some of the riffing, vocals and sound, with very good (albeit sorrowful) reason. The album is dedicated to the memory of Urgehal’s founding member Trondr Nefas (may he rest in peace). To pay their respects, many well-known O.G.s in black metal community make vocal appearances and guest guitar solos (side effects of which may include sexual arousal/melted facial features) on the album. I’ll name-drop a few of the more noteworthy guests: Nocturno Culto (Darkthrone), Niklas Kvarforth (Shining, Skitliv), Nattefrost (Carpathian Forest) and even a keyboard contribution courtesy of Lars Fredrik Frøislie (Tusmørke).
Instrumentally and aurally, this is a Norwegian black metal album made by a Norwegian black metal band. It showcases a breadth of skill by the full-time members and the contributors. Fast/holy-shit-that’s-fast, slow and mid-paced drumming, tremolo-thrashing guitars, and vocals that are consistent but not monotonous (despite the number individual performances) abound throughout, and the songs stand out on their own. “Forgettable” is a word I wouldn’t use except to illustrate inversely that the songs are memorable as shit. Aeons in Sodom opens with a disconcerting intro called “Dødsrite”: whispers are progressively drizzled with guitar feedback, and I did laugh a little when somebody in a thick Scandinavian accent starts yelling over all this to introduce the band and album—“WE ARE URGEHAL, AND WE ARE HERE TO FUCKING DESTROY YOU!” Even though I was already well aware to whom I was listening, I did appreciate the memo about their mission statement.
I was initially going to give this a raving review … and still am, a stark-raving review at that, because the cover of Autopsy’s “Twisted Mass of Burnt Decay” makes this even more of a masterpiece. Pack your bags—I guess we’re going to Sodom for an indefinite amount of time.

Saturday, November 14, 2015

Hoth Interview

Eric Peters and David Dees of the mighty Hoth open their portal hatch to discuss the past/present/future of the band, their latest album Oathbreaker, Star Wars, video games, and other shit that objectively kicks ass.


Hoth's logo, which doubles as the official flag of the desolate, ice-encrusted planet in the solar system of the same name. It's rumored that the logo will soon be instated as the symbol for the entire Anoat Sector (located in the Outer Rim Territories...something everyone who isn't a complete idiot already knows). Photo courtesy of the band.
I think I need to preface this article with a statement: I have yet to interview a band that I don't listen to on a regular basis. All of them fucking rule. Period. While it may seem my like my nose is buried deep inside the asses of the artists I interview, I haven't, and never will, request an interview from band I thought of as "shitty," mediocre", or even "pretty cool, I guess". That being said, hold onto your fucking balls because they're in very real danger of being blasted into tiny particles of dust. If you don't have any testicles, I may grant you the privilege of holding onto mine. Although they're easily big enough (gargantuan is probably a suitable word here) for all of you to share, the decision as to who gets to grip them may necessitate some sort of sordid contest. Anyways, I hope you'll enjoy this next installment of "The Coolest Shit Available On The Internet Besides Porn".
 

If your band's logo unmistakably resembles a TIE Fighter, and said band is responsible for creating the best concept album of 2014 (Metal or otherwise), chances are you're either Eric Peters or David Dees. These are the two men who form Hoth, a group capable of combining brutal blast beats, demonic shrieks, fiery onslaughts of Metal riffing, symphonic keys and even (tasteful/brief) acoustic guitars into a style of music so unique that it probably necessitates its own sub-genre. In addition to successfully making star-crushing, mind-altering Metal, it should also be noted that the two Washingtonians have mastered a rarely discussed esoteric Jedi technique of making music which sets off similar brain synapses seen in studies of patients watching high quality lesbian porn on an Oculus Rift. Despite their busy schedule consisting of work, family, social life, band practice, playing cool video games and kicking ass, they kindly granted me an opportunity to interview them.

Their origin began with a shared fondness for cool shit. "We ended up meeting about 8 years ago in college," says Eric Peters. "We both enjoyed heavy metal and drinking beer." [Editor's note: I'm positive they still enjoy both of these things.] "It wasn’t for some years later that we conceived of Hoth. I don’t remember the exact time we conceived of it, but it was during a conversation about how metal the Star Wars universe is. After that, we decided to try to put together some songs. Those early songs would later go on to become our Infinite Darkness release." 


The band, surprisingly, started out as something much different than the current form of Hoth, as David Dees explains. "We made At the Helm of the Executor with very rudimentary equipment," he says. "It was more for a joke, than anything. We posted it on Facebook and people loved it. Given the positive response, we flipped the switch from joking to ‘seriousness’ shortly after. We were surprised to see that this was a viable thing." 

Before you sign into Twitter/Hipstagram and post something like: "dood theirs a Str Wars metal band lulz! #yolo#StarWars#Sriracha#cats#ImAfuckingTool", it must be stressed that the band doesn't simply write music about Star Wars (I'm not saying they haven't...e.g: "Torn Asunder by a Wampa" and "The Rancor" from 2012's Infinite Darkness sure as hell aren't references to Goodfellas). That's why Oathbreaker took Hoth to another level, and calling the band a gimmick would, in a perfect world, land you on death row with a free pass for the next available lethal injection. 

Alternate title: Bonermaker


On Oathbreaker, there aren't any direct references to Sarlacc Pit's, Star/Sun Destroyers or light sabers (and you can bet your bitch ass/bitch life savings that there's not even a slight allusion Jar Jar Binks). While Hoth is obviously deeply inspired by the lore of the iconic franchise, it's only a minuscule part of what makes them so unique. They use the fictional universe and holy trinity of films (there are really only 3 Star Wars movies...more on that later) as a vehicle to explore musical and lyrical themes that transcend Star Wars entirely.

Lyrically, Oathbreaker is just vague enough that one wouldn't guess it was about Anakin Skywalker (as I did) unless they were familiar with the band and had a slight familiarity/interest in Star Wars. I asked if I was correct with my assumption. "Very perceptive," says Peters. "The album was not supposed to be about any single thing. It was supposed to evoke the story of Anakin Skywalker for those familiar with it, but still those who are not familiar will find something of value in the music," he says. "The story is really about the tragic hero archetype – someone who despite his best efforts ends up destroying the things he loves. It is a common story found throughout literature and mythology. We wanted to give people the experience of interpreting our music in their own way but also providing a coherent story." 


And it's not only the lyrics that tell the story: Oathbreaker was meticulously crafted musically to conjure the ideas, moods and themes of the timeless, universal tale Peters speaks of. In fact, the lyrics were the last part of the process in the creation of the album. Peters elaborates: "When we first conceived of the album we had some simple notes on how we wanted it to sound: a spiral descent into darkness. It had to get darker, lonelier, and more forlorn as you listened through the tracks. By the end, I wanted the listener to be crushed by the weight of the darkness. With that in mind we set out to create music that echoed that descent. The earlier tracks on the album possess some hints of hope, whereas the later tracks are devoid of any such thing. I believe when writing music, it is the music that needs to tell the story, the lyrics are secondary." 

Once you listen to Oathbreaker, it all comes together: track one, "The Unholy Conception", has shimmers of hope and doesn't completely crush you under its weight (not to say it isn't rocking...it is). By "Oblivion" and "Despair," the last two tracks, it's dark, evil, and about as crushing as music can get. I very sparingly using the word "epic," but often utilize the term "tits-as-fuck". In this case, both apply perfectly if one considers how layered and multi-faceted Oathbreaker, and Hoth as a band, are. Why the band hasn't yet received a Grammy, a lifetime supply of drugs shipped straight from the White House in a gold-plated semi-trick, and a rushed induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, is all far, far fucking beyond me. Then again, sometimes when I'm feeling particularly sadomasochistic or need more proof of the absence of a just (or any kind of) god, I take a look-see at what the majority of you fucking idiots fucking idiots are listening to nowadays and it all sadly makes sense. 

I wanted to take a peek at what influenced the band musically, so I asked what they liked as individuals and where their tastes converged. Peters' and Dees' musical tastes obviously differ, but they still agree on the awesomeness of many classic bands, and many specific genres. "We are both big fans of pagan/folk/viking black metal like Windir, Winterfylleth, Moonsorrow, etc.," says Peters. "We [both] enjoy old Opeth, as well as classics like Iron Maiden. I am more of a fan of early second wave black metal like Burzum, Darkthrone, and Emperor than David [Dees] is. That is not to say he dislikes any of those bands in any way, I just think I enjoy that lo-fi aesthetic more than he does. We really don’t have any 'vehement disagreements' in our musical tastes." 

Though Dees may lean a bit more to the blasty, more polished side of Metal as mentioned by Peters, Dees concurs that the two share a deep fondness for a plethora of tunes that inspire them as a unit. "I think I enjoy a lot of Death metal and Tech more than Eric," Dees says. "Bands like Nile, Vader, Inferi, Irreversible Mechanism, and Beyond Creation. But we tend to agree on most metal and have yet to offend each other. I think our enjoyment of Windir and our likeness for Pagan, Folk and Cascadian metal has played into our influences." 

They mentioned bands that have been around for a while, the tried but true mainstays, so you may be wondering what their opinions are concerning the current shape of the glorious Metal genre. Well, it just so happens I asked them about it. 
"Metal is in great shape," says Peters. "...particularly the underground metal scene. There are so many unsigned bands and bands signed to small labels that are putting out spectacular music. I often feel hardly a week goes by before I find out about another great band. And it is these bands, the underground bands, that keep the genre alive. These are the guys who work to keep it fresh. The most detrimental thing to the genre is probably lyric videos. I hate those things. Please stop." 

David Dees agrees with his band mate, but offers his own thoughts on what's shitty and what's keeping the good name of Metal from going down the road of the planet Alderaan. "I agree with Eric," he says. "I think now, thanks to the internet, I am finding good, new bands almost weekly. I think the most detrimental thing to metal is (in totally my opinion) less emphasis on songwriting, and more on aesthetics, or pure technical skill. Not to say those things don’t have their place, but my least favorite genres, are all the –cores, and Djent, and I think Tech even walks a fine line between utter wankery and gloriously executed musicianship. My problem – and what I think the big difference is between good and bad metal, is song construction, and thoughtfulness. Does the person just thoughtlessly string riffs together? Do things transition well? It’s usually pretty obvious in a song, if it is vapid and whipped-out, or not. A good metal song doesn’t feel like the length of time that it occupies. A good example of that is Myrkgrav’s 'Vonde Auer'. That song is a little 6 minutes long and it’s always over before I notice. Conversely, if you play an Attack Attack song for me, I feel like it takes 6 hours to stop displeasing my eardrums." 

It's good to hear that master craftsmen such as Dees and Peters hate the same shit, and are into a lot of the same shit, as I am. I felt an even stronger bond between the band and myself when I inquired about the three newest Star Wars "movies". 
"No idea what you are talking about," answers Peters, as if he had picked at my brain and reflected my deepest feelings of hatred for the films in his own words. It makes me warm inside to imagine that he would have had a touch (or, preferably, a great deal of) anger in his voice were this a phone interview. His next words should be inscribed on a monolith so that humanity, or visitors to our planet in the distant future, will remember for eternity: "There are only 3 Star Wars movies." Dees was a little more subtle about his dislike for episodes I-III. Though he thought that the first one "Had some cool vehicles," he then concedes: "I don’t think I’ve made it through the [other two] more than once or twice." 

Which brought us to the inevitable inquiry about the release of Star Wars: The Force Awakens. I'm a little hesitant about the new J.J. Abrams adaptation. I've learned to walk into a movie these days without any expectations. I recall having such high hopes for the new Godzilla. The trailers sneakily led me to believe that it was going to be a Godzilla movie and not another one of Hollywood's successful attempts to see how many times it can make me walk out of a theater with a rage-induced hemorrhoid. 

All my rectal problems aside, the fellows in Hoth had a few things to say about the up-and-coming Star Wars film. "I am looking forward to it," says Peters. "I love the use of practical special effects and I enjoyed Abrams’ take on Star Trek, so I have confidence that Episode VII will be great fun." 
Although he is obviously enthused at the potential the film carries, Dees is a little bit more apprehensive on the subject, and I can't say I blame him. "I’m worried that it will be another Kingdom of the Crystal Skull," he says. "But the good news is they can never take the trilogy away from us. The rumored story line of Kylo Ren searching the galaxy for artifacts of Vader, is quite badass. We’ll see, it’s going to be a great surprise! Eric and I have already filed for time off work on December 18th. We’re declaring it a holiday."

And, per usual, I discussed video games with the band I interviewed. You wouldn't think it, but some people don't actually play video games...luckily Hoth do not fall into this abhorrent subset of humanity. 
"I love the Mass Effect trilogy with a great deal of passion," says Peters. "It is probably the best science fiction out there, video game or otherwise. I grew up playing a lot of Heroes III and Brood War. I also remember fondly the SNES and N64 Zelda games. More recently I have been playing a lot of Skyrim and some Destiny."

Dees mentions many of the games he's playing, and there's overlap and a pattern in their tastes. "I’m a long time WoW player," he says. "I play Alliance and Horde. I’ve got a human warrior and a blood elf rogue. I also play Starcraft quite often. I’m a big fan of the Kirby games (just the platforming ones). I think Eric and I share an equal likeness for the Zelda franchise. I also play a lot of JRPGs, I really enjoyed NiNo Kuni, most recently, and am currently playing Shovel Knight, Destiny, and Bloodborne." 

And then I ask the divisive, yet most important, question: SNES or Genesis? "SNES," says Peters. " Zelda, Mario, Super Metroid!". Dees agrees, not only with Peters, but with every sane gamer out there: yes, Genesis had Splatterhouse 3 and a great deal of masterpieces, but it doesn't compare to the god machine known as the Super Nintendo. 
"SNES," answers Dees. "Genesis had the Shining Force games, but SNES had Super Metroid, Super Mario RPG, Kirby Super Star, Super Mario All Stars, Chrono Trigger and the early Final Fantasy games." Spot on, guys. You just listed off some of my favorite games of all time. I'd buy you a goddamn beer if I lived in Washington.

 
Eric Peters and David Dees stand victoriously after a successful speed-run of Chrono Trigger. Photo Courtesy of the band.
Apart from the fact that they love awesome video games, more good news comes flowing in, like a transmission from Admiral Akbar relaying that the gargantuan shipment of coke and strippers I ordered has arrived safely from Endor: Dees and Peters both hint that they're working on new material. 
"I hope we will have something to show soon. We plan on continuing with Hoth for a good long while still," says Peters. "And to all of our fans: thanks for your support. Every album you buy, every t-shirt, really, truly, honestly helps us create more music." Dees would like to thank all you all for reading the interview, and says he's always down as shit to talk about Star Wars and video games. A perfect band to interview for a blog that is incorrigible with its inquiries to bands regarding video games.

Get their shit at the links below, and support some cool fucking musicians who make some cool fucking music (word on the street is, if you ask them nicely, they may just sign the shit you order upon request):

http://hothmetal.com
http://hothmusic.bandcamp.com
https://www.facebook.com/hothmetal  
 
-Nuko Kapao

 

Wednesday, November 11, 2015

Basil Poledouris - Robocop Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Vinyl Re-issue)

(ORIGINALLY APPEARED IN SLUG MAGAZINE, ISSUE 323-NOVEMBER 2015)    

ORIGINAL ARTICLE: http://www.slugmag.com/national-music-reviews/basil-poledouris-robocop-original-motion-picture-soundtrack/ 

SLUG (Salt Lake UnderGround) MAGAZINE HOMEPAGE: http://www.slugmag.com/

 

Basil Poledouris – Robocop Original Sound Track

Basil Poledouris Robocop Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Vinyl Re-issue)

Milan Records
Street: 07.17
Basil Poledouris = John Williams + Danny Elfman x Vangelis

Ever seen Robocop? No, not that soft-served fecal matter, completely bullshit PG-13 “remake” that came out last year. This is the original score to Paul Verhoeven’s masterpiece, and a must-have for all you “vinyl-has-that-sound-that-nothing-else-can-capture” turds who somehow also happen to like the best movies in cinematic history (don’t worry … I’ll forgive you for being idiotic hipsters because it’s the FUCKING ROBOCOP SOUNDTRACK). Basil Poledouris did one hell of a job composing this—at once capturing the themes of the movie musically (shit getting thoroughly blasted, sharp, witty social commentary and more shit getting thoroughly blasted) while also keeping the fast approaching ’90s sound the fuck out. The titles of the tracks are accurate, awesome and prompt you to know where you are in the movie if you’re a dumbass (“Gas Station Blow-Up,” “Clarence frags Bob,” “Big Is Better”). One of the best soundtracks of all time to one of the best movies of all time. –Nuko Kapao

 

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

PreEmptive Strike 0.1 Interview

Holy shit! I interviewed PreEmptive Strike 0.1 for Regen Magazine. Read the best Q/A article ever written by an entity that's not inter-demensional in nature by clicking here: http://regenmag.com/interviews/preemptive-strike-0-1-interview-the-extermination-has-already-begun/

Thanks to Regen Mag for publishing the interview, PreEmptive Strike 0.1 for putting up with me, and of course myself for kicking so much ass. Click on Regen Mag's homepage for up-to-date news on underground/electronic/industrial/other stuff too, you dipshit: http://regenmag.com/






Monday, August 3, 2015

Tempel Interview


Recording The Moon Lit Our Path, getting heavier with age, bloodied snare drums, used-up SNES's, and me being a rambling, unprofessional shitstain: An interview with Ryan Wenzel of Tempel

 
 Tempel taking a break from recording, but still in full "kicking-ass-with-the-best-instrumental-metal-around" mode. Photo courtesy of the band.

Listening to many instrumental metal bands makes me feel like I’ve been injected with SARS-tainted blood from a bent, rusty needle straight into my urethra: you might say it causes me slight discomfort. Not so with Tempel, who create uncannily dense, majestic masterpieces (and I’m not just sucking them off because they agreed to do the first interview for my shitty awesome blog). Their latest album, The Moon Lit Our Path, which was released June 16th via ProstheticRecords, gave me so much enjoyment that it ensured I would never get my apartment deposit back due to the now-nonexistent wall that was demolished by a highly pressurized burst of semen. 

Ryan Wenzel didn’t offer to cover my expenses for the collateral damage his new album indirectly caused, but he did offer an explanation as to what sets Tempel apart from their peers in the realm of vocalist-free metal. “I think there are a lot of instrumental metal bands out there that rely heavily on technical song writing or bands that are very ‘post’ or ‘sludgy’. We’ve been affiliated with the last two but not so much the technical scene,” he says. Maybe they’re not Necrophagist-technical, but their music is tighter than 72 virgins who await a suicide-bombing religious fanatic in heaven and heavier than every individual belonging to the 75% of overweight Americans combined. Give them a listen and you’ll know what I’m talking about: the tunes are eclectic to say the very least. You’ll hear hints of grindcore, black, death, post metal, and more genres than I care to mention (fuck off, I’m lazy). The ground covered in their music varies greatly, and Wenzel explains his past and current musical inspirations. “When I was younger and in high school I think Opeth, Tool and Meshuggah were the first eye opening bands that set the foundation of what kind of musician or fan of music I’d become. These day’s we are all over the map with bands. Just some examples currently in rotation are Drudkh, Genesis, Pig Destroyer, Iron Maiden [Editor’s note: two of the best bands to ever exist; anyone who name-drops Pig Destroyer in an interview automatically kicks ass, unless you’re Underoath or Five-Finger Death Suck or something, but we only interview cool musicians], Yes, and YOB,” he says. Wenzel elaborates further on their one-of-a-kind, groundbreaking style: “I think of Tempel as just an instrumental metal band, we try to cover a lot of ground but keep it cohesive in some way. We get annoyed when we’re labeled as a specific genre or scene; everyone has to label you as something."

Hearing about his dislike for people attempting to neatly pack Tempel into a genre box, which many of us are quick to do with music (and the dumbest of us enjoy doing), I didn’t feel too guilty about my descriptions of the band. I’ve always been just obscure, albeit bizarrely accurate, enough to make sure that I use more than two words: instrumental metal does loosely describe them, but truly doesn’t do them the justice they deserve. To my unenlightened friends, I describe Tempel’s albums as “the soundtracks to movies where legions of hot naked women make out with each other and then proceed to blow shit up using Gundam suits,” so it wasn’t surprising to hear Wenzel speak of film as one of the biggest driving forces behind band’s sound. “We’re big fans of movies,” he says. “[Writing Tempel’s music is] almost like making a score to an imaginary film. The melodies are the most important aspect of creating a sense of emotions without a vocalist.” His fondness for moving pictures and the impact they have on Tempel is emphasized further: “I think that shows in the style of music we make. It can be very cinematic at times,” he says. However, Tempel’s creative approach doesn’t necessarily begin with a concrete cinematic idea: that happens at the end, after climbing the steps of a monolithic temple, a journey of countless miles that begins with a single riff. “[A] song’s meaning or concept is actually the last part of the process for us,” says Wenzel. “Once the album is finished we finalize the album’s concept and create the song titles around it. We had the idea of continuing the story from the first album immediately, other than that it was all thought up towards the end. I think we try to make our music sound as full as possible. Each song has a different sound to it, as if we are trying to accomplish a different part of the story.”

Yet perhaps the most important story regarding Tempel is their own. They’ve existed in some form since 2003. Old members boned out for one reason or another, and now the only remaining musicians are Wenzel and his band mate Rich Corle, both of whom, unsurprisingly, have always been the main architects of this enigmatic group. “We've been best friends since our freshman year of high school," says Wenzel, regarding his relationship with drummer Corle. “Rich and I have a huge respect for each other’s opinions and ideas. When someone feels strongly about something we always try to compromise to get the end result to where it needs to be. We don’t have any intention of adding members or getting anyone else involved because we feel like what we’re doing is working well.” He’s right, and those greasy stains adorning my living complex, despite the massive surface area they permeate, are but miniscule indicators of Tempel’s success. The group has come a long way in their 12+ year history, eventually accomplishing more with two people than most bands do with 5 or more. “Technically we weren’t the current form of Tempel back in 2003. We had more members that eventually went their own ways. We didn’t even have a band name at that point. [I don’t] even think we had that until we were recording On the Steps of the Temple," says Wenzel.
He speaks of their first full-length, which took three years to record and perfect (significantly longer, actually, if you count everything leading up to the recording of the demos). “[Recording] On the Steps of the Temple was a big learning process on what to do and what not to do in the studio,” says Mr. Wenzel. “When the time came to work on the new album we wanted to make sure we were 100% with the songs before we started the final recording process. This meant that we flushed out the demos as much as possible and made sure the songs were there. The final versions of the album mirror the demos almost exactly, minus a few sections being trimmed down a bit,” he says.

Cover of On the Steps of the Tempel. The only mistake they made on the album was misspelling "tempel" in the title/title track.

Fast-forward to 2015: just when I thought they couldn’t make another album that would make me think twice about my distaste for instrumental metal, they released The Moon Lit Our Path, a work of artistic genius. It’s even darker, heavier, blastier, and better than it’s predecessor by leaps and bounds. Wenzel explains that that the sheer awesomeness (my words, not his) of The Moon Lit Our Path came from the learning experiences of recording the first album, the musical influences he mentioned, as well as the inevitable fact that musicians naturally progress with time. “We wanted to stray away from the post-metal sound because we kind of grew out of it ourselves,” says Wenzel. “I think our strongest material from Steps were the heavier songs. We wanted to make a heavier metal album and try to increase the dynamics and melody,” he says. “We also feel like the song writing is a lot stronger and more focused for [The Moon Lit Our Path] too. Steps was written a long time ago, so we’ve had a lot time to grow musically for this album.” The approach worked, as the new album earned significant praise (most importantly from me, but it’s worth mentioning that they were featured on Fenriz’ radio show), received mostly above average write-ups from a community of notoriously douchey reviewers, and secured Tempel on my list of favorites. 


Rich Corle wasn’t available for comment, so Mr. Wenzel recounts how, while recording the new album, Corle brought the heaviness in the drumming department. “Rich hit the drums so hard that he cracked all his crash cymbals and one of my own by the end of the recording,” says Wenzel. “We recorded the album in song order, so I’m pretty sure there’s a different crash cymbal on the last 3 songs. The snare drum head was also beaten to a pulp and there were specks of blood on it,” he says. Tempel put their heart, soul, and, more literally, their blood and sweat into the creation of The Moon Lit Our Path. The result is a flawless victory, complete with a Sub Zero-style, spinal-column-removing fatality of an album closer. 
Cover of The Moon Lit Our Path. Everything about the album is perfect in every way, and there isn't a typo to be seen.
Speaking of video games (which I so often do), does Wenzel share my hobby in electronic gaming? “I used to play video games quite a bit,” he says. He recounts owning both a Sega Genesis and a Super Nintendo, the latter of which received much more attention (also something the two of us have in common; it’s an objectively superior system, get over it, the Genesis pales in comparison to the game selection and overall awesomeness of the SNES). He said he played his SNES so much, that one day it just stopped working. “[That] was a sad day,” he says. Though I have no way of knowing for sure, he’s probably, and hopefully, fighting back tears as he recounts the tale of when his beloved system finally had enough.
Tempel standing by some cacti, one of which may or may not be the grave marker for his dead Super Nintendo. Photo courtesy of the band.
Mr. Wenzel and I may have a mutual love for video games in common, yet, unlike me, he’s grown up and moved on: he has responsibilities and an actual life. “Working on [the new] album, my job and my family priorities have pretty much eliminated [time for video games],” he says. “I do however play some kid friendly games with my son,” he says. When he does have time playing video games, he mentions some of the newer ones he’s been into: “Some of my favorite games of all time are Bioshock, Portal, Batman Arkham series, Street Fighter IV and the Uncharted series,” says Wenzel. [Editor’s note: though he made no such statements, and the following is borderline libel, I'm going to speculate that he also loves the Megaman X series, Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia, Chrono Trigger, and every Shin Megami Tensei game in the series, especially Persona 3: FES].
 
If you haven’t listened to Tempel yet after reading this far into the article, you’re more than likely an asshole, and more than likely wondering: what’s their trick to success, and, ultimately, why is there a line around the block of people waiting to get their erections drained at the hospital (and a worldwide, exponential epidemic of female crotch moisture)? It’s much simpler than I thought: honest guys making honest music from the heart, first and foremost. The rest is all a byproduct of dedication and their love of making music that rules. “We always will be music fans creating music that we’d like to listen to or would enjoy ourselves,” says Wenzel. “Thanks to everyone who’s helped support us in any way. We just like to create music and anyone that enjoys what we do, and listens to it is such an honor to us,” he says. “The success or positive feedback is all a bonus from there. We never thought any of this would happen. When we released the first album on Bandcamp in 2012 everything that happened after was just insanity. It all still seems odd to me.” Rest assured, Mr. Wenzel: It doesn’t to me.—Nuko Kapao

Click on everything below/get their shit:
https://www.facebook.com/Tempelofficialband
https://twitter.com/tempelband
https://tempelofficial.bandcamp.com/
http://prostheticrecords.com/

Click below if you want to read about them in German, because, for some reason, it's the only Wikipedia page about them:
https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tempel_%28Band%29